I looked at the clock for the tenth time in as many minutes. Ben should have been home from his doctor’s appointment half an hour ago and I was starting to worry. Fuck I always worry although I try to hide it from him. But he knows.

I heard his key turn in the lock and composed myself before I turned to him.

"Hey!"

He gave me his dazzling smile that made my heart melt in response and I returned it but try as I might I know it did not reach my eyes.

"What did the doctor say?"

"I’m fine."

I knew he was lying. He would keep the truth from me until he was ready to talk. He always did and I accepted it as part of who he is.

I stood and walked over to him, wrapping my arms around his waist, resting my head on his chest. He hesitated for a moment before pulling me closer and I listened to the steady beat of his heart. I blinked back the tears that I knew were close to falling before pulling away and reaching for his hand and dragging him upstairs to our room.

I undressed him slowly and pushed him onto the bed, before removing my clothes and climbing under the covers next to him.

I rested my head on his chest in that all too familiar position, reaching for his hand and entwining my fingers with his, the light shining through the window catching our wedding rings and I felt a shiver travel through my body.

"Mich……" I brought my fingers up touching his lips, silencing him. Now wasn’t the time for words.

I pushed him onto his back and ran my fingers through his hair as I placed light kisses over his face.

He grabbed me, flipping me onto my back, his eyes meeting mine before he began to trace a trail of kisses down my chest. I sighed softly as he ran his tongue up the length of my cock, my fingers clawing at the bedclothes as he took me into his mouth.

I let out a low moan as I watched my cock glide slowly in and out of his mouth, small beads of sweat breaking out over my body. I cried out his name as I came within minutes and he crawled up the bed enveloping me in his strong arms.

I held him as tightly as I could; the tears that I had managed to hold back earlier trickled down my cheeks as I buried my face in his neck.

Whatever was wrong we would fight it together; this disease maybe part of him but so was I.